Somebody's Been Sleeping in my Bed as I had Expected
by sodaNK
Summary: Hachiman and Yukino are married and have a family. What happens when Yukino finds out he has been cheating on her?
Somebody has been sleeping in my bed, as I had expected.

* * *

 _Something's in the air_

* * *

Adultery is an act of amorous nature, where the guilty adulterer unfaithfully commits to another lover, usually without the knowledge and permission of a spouse.

Such a thing is laughable to me. I had no fear of cheating on my significant other. I believed that he would do the same. I _had_ believed in him.

The door was unlocked clumsily, as if the person behind the door was intoxicated. Hikigaya Hachiman stepped into the doorway, leaning on the wall as he took off his shoes, _Vivienne Westwood_ s, and stumbled into the living room. He looked at me, a scarlet red blush on his cheeks. Were they of flustered affections as they were 10 years ago? Hardly.

"Yo...Yukino..? Y-you're home… early~"

"Disgusting. What have you been doing? Go and bathe. Don't wake Haru up."

It was disheartening seeing how pathetic my _husband_ attempted to maneuver through our minimalistically designed house. Pitying him, I stood up from our couch and took him by the waist and shoulder and carried him to our bedroom.

Unfortunately, he didn't seem to recognise the sincerity in my action. He nuzzled his nose against my neck, and with me wearing my nightgown, he had a lot to work with. He grabbed my waist and pushed me against the wall.

"Heh, Yukino… you smell good~"

"Please control yourself Hachiman. Although you may be drunk and my husband, I have no qualms about seeking legal action should you attempt anything."

He seemed to sober up a little from that, look at me with a dazed look. However, I noticed something. My _j'adore_ didn't have the zestiness of the _l'elixir_ on him. **(1)**

 _I answer the phone and there's nobody there  
And you're changin' the way  
That you're wearin' your hair  
And I wonder  
Yes I wonder_

We found ourselves in our bedroom. Hikigaya Hachiman layed sprawled on the king-sized bed, a dumb, uncharacteristic grin on his face. The door was locked.

I layed down beside him, fingers trailing his chest. His physique was attractive, especially after several years of conditioning. As I've said many times before, it was a pity his eyes were dead. But maybe I don't have as much adversity against them as I thought.

He was still grinning, muttering unintelligibly. Why was he so ignorant, so blissful, of the crime he had commited.

I got up and grabbed his jacket. I scowled. There was definitely another scent. While he did use cologne, _Adidas_ smelt nothing like it.

* * *

 _Something's on my mind  
The letters you get, cigarettes that I find  
And you know that I'd have to be deaf, dumb and blind  
Not to wonder  
Not to wonder  
_

* * *

Was this a one-off thing? Or had he been serially cheating on me. It was difficult to keep paranoia out when the other person is someone you cannot live without. I thought about who could be the other perpetrator.

Morally, I shouldn't even consider Yui. She was our closest _friend,_ but despite still harbouring feelings for Hachiman, she couldn't be capable of an act of adultery.

Isshiki Iroha. While we're not necessarily enemies, it was undeniable that it was very plausible for _her_ to be the one. However, she wasn't even in Japan currently.

Miura Yumiko? She's too obsessed with Hayama to even lower herself to Hachiman.

Hina Ebina? She may have had an interest in Hachiman, according to him, and with her "rotten" personality, she may be. But according to Yui's Facebook, she was off to an anime convention in Tokyo.

Kawasaki Saki. She had crushed on him, but she was morally sound. She _probably_ wouldn't break another's family up.

Lastly, my sister. Haruno Yukinoshita. Selfish, greedy, and borderline evil, adultery wouldn't be out of her reach. Hikigaya Hachiman might have hated her, but her ability to seduce couldn't be belittled. Could she be the one?

I checked his phone. His contacts list was short, just a few names, including the ones I thought of.

 _Haruno Yukinoshita; last messaged; over a year ago_

Right. That didn't rule her entirely out, but it was a start. However, I did notice something peculiar.

 _Tsurumi Rumi; last called; 3 hours ago;_

Tsurumi… Rumi. A long time ago she was the lonely primary schooler. Now, she's a reporter for the news agency Hachiman works at.

Things started to click.

* * *

 _Who's been sleeping in my bed  
Gettin' what I get  
When I don't get it  
Who's been sleeping in my bed  
Yeah, that's what I said  
I just don't get it  
Who's been sleeping  
Who's been sleeping in my bed?_

* * *

The grandfather clock on the wall ticked gradually, without a care in the world. Just like the man who walked into the kitchen, sheepishly rubbing his head. He pulled out a chair, and sat across me. His breakfast of toast now rather cold, possibly because of me.

"Morning. Haru…?"

"He's gone to school. Dropped him off earlier."

"That's great, I guess. Day off today?"

"I decided so, yes. I wanted to spend some leisure time with my _dearest husband_."

He bit into the toast, eyes looking up at me perplexed. I crossed my legs, and my arms, leaning back into the chair.

"You went to a company function yesterday, yes? Was it fun? I guess it was. Lots of aromas flying around. _Some landed on your shirt._ "

I spat out the last line with a bit more spite than I had wanted. However, this seemed to catch his attention, and he quickly caught on.

"Yukino. You always go to dinners as well. You must understand."

"I do, oh, I do. However, my instincts tell me this hasn't been the only time."

"What did you mean by that? Please elaborate with explanations."

I glared at him. He was calmly sipping coffee. It wasn't MAX Coffee, but he made do with it.

"Tsurumi Rumi is a reporter at your news agency. I do believe she is interested in you romantically."

"Please continue. I do not see where this could be going."

I bit the inside of my lip. Is he so dense, or is he just feigning ignorance. Seeing what kind of person he is, I'd assume the latter.

"You've been cheating on me with her, is what I'm saying."

"Just from smelling a different woman's perfume on me? Yukinoshita I thought we were logical monsters."

"If _you_ were, then you'd realise it'd be best to spill now. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, however."

"What kind of incentive would I have to cheat on you, and why would you suspect her of all people? Just because we're co-workers?"

"... We've been in abstinence ever since Haru was born. Coupled with my inability to produce any more, I'd think you would search for alternative _relief_."

"You still think I'm holding it against you for it?"

"Also, I've noticed and checked a few things. Your spaces in the office are _surprisingly close._ Furthermore, even if you're her boss, you two share a lot of work together."

"Ha. Using your power as one of the biggest politicians in Chiba, really? And as you've said, I am her boss. I don't think we're that much closer on our jobs more than any other boss and employee."

He finished the last of his toast. His coffee was almost finished, just like how my patience was wearing thin.

"Funny thing is, you two have been communicating with each other a lot, with especially intimate phrasing of your words."

"Ignoring the fact that you've been snooping on my phone, I'm pretty sure that's just me being the smooth talker I am. But alright. I'll come clean."

Oh no. The realisation hit me. The answer I was looking for was something I didn't want to hear. My own pride and requisite to win has once again cause my doom.

I frantically stood up and slammed my hands on the table. He cupped his hands on the table, tilted his head down.

"Hachiman, I-"

"I have been cheating on you with Tsurumi Rumi."

No, no, no, no. What we had worked so hard to create, our relationship that was built on all our insecurities, emotion and love. It just crumbled.

"Don't worry. You're not in the least bit at fault. It's all me. The messages on my phone aren't even the tip of the iceberg. I've deleted many messages. It seems that I got careless last night. I didn't even go for a function yesterday. When you called me, the background noise was from a TV in her bedroom. Indeed, only her perfume was on my jacket."

The tears wouldn't stop flowing. He smiled at me grimly.

"When… how long has this been going on?"

He shrugged his shoulders.

"A couple of months, maybe over a year."

"So… it was when you found out I was no longer fertile."

"No, it was after, but that wasn't the reason."

"What do you want now?"

"What do _you_ want? If we get a divorc-"

"No, please, no! I'll do anything! Please don't leave Haru and I!"

He fell silent. I realised how sudden my outburst was. Trembling, I walked behind him, and wrapped my arms around him.

"Please… just cut off your ties with that woman. I'll get you a job in another news agency, I'm even willing to forget this ever happened."

This wasn't Yukino Yukinoshita. This was a shell of her, desperate to try and save something, the only thing she truly had.

He gently held my hands, caressing them as he did so.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

 _Who's been sleeping in my bed?  
Who's been sleeping in my bed?  
Who's been...  
You gotta tell me...  
You gotta  
Gotta gotta tell me c'mon  
Hell I can see it in your eyes  
That you've been seeing other guys  
Tell me who's been sleeping in my bed?..._

* * *

"So. You've told her about us?"

"Well yeah. She's in denial. She still treats me normally, except more _dere_ than _kuu_ now."

"Hmm. Does she know about the baby?"

"No, haven't told her yet. If I do now, I don't think she'd be able to take it."

"Still caring for her, even after cheating for so long? You're really mean, Hachi."

"Maybe. I don't think she's going to accept a divorce, though. Should I just appease her, but still secretly meet you?"

"We could. Let's see how it turns out. Sigh, if she had just given you to me those years ago this wouldn't have happened."

"Mhmm. I'll call you back. She's coming back soon."

"Ok, bye~"

* * *

 **(1) Perfumes**

Yo. This here's a concept which I have been really wanting to write, ever since I heard the song _Who's been sleeping in my bed_ by Barry Manilow, which the story is somewhat inspired by, hence the title, although it doesn't really match. Eh, this is just a one-shot tho, but I'll upload the bad end in another chapter. 8man is OOC in this one, cos everybody knows he isn't the kind of person to cheat. But hey, this is just an idea from my twisted mind.

For an update on _My Love Life is not as I had expected,_ Kawasaki's chapter is a third done. Don't know when you can expect it because I'm doing editing and beta-reader work for my friend, who's working on a novel.

Anyway, thanks for reading. See ya.


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